Partners should be aware that there are limitations on sexual activity when becoming a Surrogate
If a woman who has a partner makes the decision to become a Surrogate, she must be certain that her partner is willing to abstain from sexual intercourse during certain parts of the surrogacy journey. She must make sure that both she and her partner understand the fertility struggle that has resulted in Surrogacy.
Once both the Surrogate and her partner are on board, it comes as no surprise when the fertility clinic tells them that they must abstain from sex during certain time frames within the surrogacy process. If they are willing to abstain from sexual intercourse, it´s important to understand when, how, and if sexual activity will be restricted and for what amount of time.
As a Surrogate, you become pregnant through medical intervention, not via sexual intercourse. The medical and clinical process is called Invitro Fertilization. You go to the fertility clinic where the Intended Parents have their embryo ready, and it will be inserted into your uterus.
Invitro Fertilization does not mean that you become pregnant immediately. It takes some time to confirm the pregnancy; once it is confirmed the doctor will determine when you may begin normal sexual activity. One thing you must be aware of is that you can become pregnant with your own child while carrying another. This means that as a fertile woman, you run the risk of getting pregnant again. This is the reason some fertility clinics may require up to 10 weeks after embryo transfer before a Surrogate is allowed to engage in sexual intercourse.
Sexual Conduct Limitations
Limits on your sexual conduct while you are a Surrogate are determined by the fertility clinics. Each fertility clinic is different and not every item in this list applies to every clinic.
- Before the Embryo Transfer date Fertility clinics do set time limitations using the embryo transfer data as a reference point. This means that there will be a period of time prior to the embryo transfer when sex is off limits to prevent you, the Surrogate, from becoming pregnant naturally.
- Monogamy A fertility clinic may require you, the Surrogate, to be monogamous in your sexual relationships. Your partner will be medically tested for any sexual disease that could affect you or the baby, and if any is found, the clinic may determine that sexual intercourse is not recommended.
- After the Embryo Transfer The Surrogate should refrain from intense physical activity or excitement; therefore, there will be no sexual intercourse immediately after the transfer. This is due to the pelvic movement that occurs during sexual intercourse that could reduce the probability of the embryo attaching to the uterine lining. The fertility clinics will let you know when it is safe to resume sexual activity.
- Using a condom After the pregnancy is confirmed by the clinic, then you, the Surrogate, and your partner may resume sexual activity but use a condom for protection. Although not all fertility clinics require the Surrogate’s partner to use one, it is common practice.
Benefits to Sexual Activity during Surrogacy
There are benefits to the Surrogate being sexually active during the pregnancy.
- Exercise Sex burns calories, so as a Surrogate this is an excellent way to get active and fit. This will also be beneficial for labor; the stronger you are, the simpler labor can be.
- Lower risk of preeclampsia If you are sexually active, the sexual activity reduces blood pressure and therefore decreases the risk of a blood pressure spike during the pregnancy.
- More sleep The more sexually active you are as a Surrogate, the more sleep you will get. This is beneficial for you and the baby.
If your Intended Parents bring up the question about sex during pregnancy with worries about having their baby hurt or discomforted in some way due to sexual intercourse, let them know that the baby is physiologically protected from intercourse. First of all, the uterus is a strong muscle within the female body that contains the baby. The uterus has two muscle linings that protect anything from interfering with the child’s growth. Right after the second layer of uterine muscle comes the placenta. The placenta is natural tissue that is softer that outlines and protects the amniotic sac. The amniotic sac holds the baby in the amniotic liquid, creating another layer of protection.
So, the liquid from the sac, the tissue from the placenta, and the two muscle lines from the uterus protect the baby. The uterus closes itself off to the vagina by thick mucus to prevent any sort of liquid or matter from entering the uterus and affecting the baby.
Sexual intercourse is good for a Surrogate while pregnant with the baby. If any bleeding or pain is caused by intercourse, then the Surrogate should speak to her Surrogate Support Team and visit her doctor. All Surrogates have gone through pregnancy before, so they know what to expect in terms of sexual intercourse. A Surrogate’s purpose is to deliver a healthy baby to the parents, which is the most important outcome of this whole journey.